The Spider's Web
by YuuIsAVampida
Summary: A collection of fluffy Yuullen fic-lets that may or may not have sequels about possible ways for Yullen to start. Ch. #1: Paradox.. "He decided to wait until tomorrow. Then, he could wait until science and …borrow the bean's cell phone. Brilliance."
1. Paradox

**Hello readers!**

**This is a multi-chapter fic that I shall be starting (and hopefully ending..). It's basically a bunch of unrelated fluffy Yullen one-shots that have been collecting dusting in my notebook for a few weeks. I already have the next chapter written so it shouldnt take that long to upload.**

**I should warn you that majority of the chapters I have planned are like...**_**potential**_**Yullen. And not established Yullen. If there is any established Yullen it'll happen WAY into the future..**

Whenever Kanda Yuu went out in public, he had a very specific intent. Majority of the time, said intent was to get to his destination and get back with out being noticed; Kanda did not like being surrounded by annoying people. So one fateful Sunday night, Kanda mapped out a very complex route to get to the local library and back home without incident.

Knowing the people that live in his immediate area, an assortment of weirdoes, stalkers, creeps, and obsessive fan girls, this task was nearly impossible.

Almost every time Kanda stepped foot into a public place, the same thing happened _every_ _time_. First, he heard the ear grating high pitched giggles of some girls that had happened to know who he was. Annoyed, he would cast a weary glance in their general direction and he always saw the fierce blush growing rapidly upon on the girls' faces. Next, he heard loud whispers about him, his hair, and his "totally radical mini-van". Who actually says that about a beat up _mini-van_?

And then finally, some girl, normally the outsider in the crowd of friends walks over and tries to make awkward conversation. On average, the conversations go like this:

"Um, hey. You're Kanda, right?"

"Che."

"Um, I've seen you around the high school and um…you look pretty…scholarly?"

You can probably guess what happens next. Kanda gives the girl a demonic and she quickly stands scurries away and takes a seat with her friends, who are trying to control their uncontrollable laughing. The youth these days.

And on a not-so-rare occasion, Kanda would step outside of his house and be greeted with the extremely unwanted sight of his neighbor, Tyki Mikk sitting outside of his house, watching him intently.

Every single time this had occurred, Kanda had tried his best to ignore the man and the urge to go call the police and boarded his car instead of taking his normal walk.

Then preceded a very heated car chase between Kanda and his compulsive neighbor, usually ending with him catching up to Kanda at a red light and always told Kanda the same message.

"Hey, boy, I think someone stole your newspaper this morning." Despite the fact that Kanda _knew_who had been stealing is newspaper and honestly didn't care.

At that, Kanda would proceed to tell him to, "Stay off the green, creep." And drove off.

So in order to avoid this, Kanda had set an alarm to wake him up at five o'clock on the dot. He immediately shot up and grabbed his cell phone. He scrolled through his tiny contact list and selected "Bookman".

_Ring…Ring…Ring…_

"Hello, Bookman Library, Lavi speaking." Kanda snickered at how professional Lavi sounded.

"Che. Is it crowded there?"

Lavi gasped. "You're coming to visit me, Yuu?" There was short pause. "Or are you coming to ask me out on a date-"

"No. I don't remember how many times I've told you. I. Am. Straight."

"Whatever you say Yuu. You'll come around." Kanda closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. "Anyway, well, it depends on what you would define crowded as." He could picture the smug smirk on Lavi's face as he said this. "But if you were to ask me how many people were in here I'd say around six or seven."

"Yeah, thanks. Bye." Kanda muttered and clamped his phone closed. He got up off of his bed and started getting ready for the day.

On his way to his dark blue mini-can, Kanda got more outlandish looks then he normally did. Today, he had chosen to wear a large, black pullover hooded sweater and a pair of sweat pants. Upon seeing him, one would think he was going to run in the park on a winter day, despite the fact it was around ninety degrees that day. But Kanda Yuu didn't sweat anyway so what does it matter?

When Kanda slid his car into a parking space in font of the library, he was on a look out for anyone he knew. When he was certain the area was clear, Kanda had stepped out of his car and slammed the door shut. As he headed around the van, he rubbed his finger along the key-scratched words, "Yuu Mobile" written in an obnoxiously huge scrawl by none other that Lavi.

As he stared at it for a few seconds, his overwhelming anger towards his so-called friend had been rekindled and amplified by a few thousand.

Kanda thought about how many legal loop holes he would have to jump through to get a restraining order against Lavi for his dearest Mugen as he stepped into the library.

Without casting a glance at anyone in the library, Kanda made a beeline for the back of the library, specifically the break room, where he was certain Lavi would be.

"Rabbit." Kanda called, as he got closer to the entrance of the small room. Before Kanda could step in though, he had unwillingly made contact with an emerald green eye.

"Hey, Yuu! You seem to be in quite a rush, since it took you around…" Lavi glanced at his wrist watch. "eight minutes to get here. How many miles over the limit were you driving?"

"20."

"Ahh, I see. So when are you going to pick me up?"

It took a moment for Kanda to understand what Lavi was talking about. "Che. Where is the book Tiedoll assigned?"

"Geez, Yuu. Four other kids from school are asking me for it. You guys seriously need to do your homework earlier." Lavi shook his head disapprovingly.

"Shut up. Where is the book?"

"I'm not sure if he have anymore copies."

"Then go check, _baka_."

"Calm down, Yuu. There's no need to use your magical language."

Kanda rolled his eyes. "If it was magical, then the entire country of Japan would be wizards. I've never seen any besides cosplayers."

"The magic is in the eye of the beholder." Lavi had said wistfully. "Quoted from one of my favorite works."

Kanda chortled. "What work is that exactly?"

"The Manual of Random Facts by some dude named Komui Lee." Lavi said. He stepped over a mass of wires and quickly started flipping through pages in a large binder. "Sorry, Yuu-chan. Some kid checked it our already."

"Who?" Kanda asked instinctively.

"It's a bookman's code to keep everyone's privacy, Yuu."

"_Who?_"

"You have no respect for my career, Yuu. It saddens me." Kanda held back a snide comment on how poor Lavi was at his future career.

"This is the last time I'm going to ask you. Who checked out the book?"

"I refuse to tell you, Yu-" Kanda abruptly stepped forward and not-so-gently shoved Lavi away from the table. Kanda quickly scanned the page and saw that the book had been taken by somebody named Allen Walker.

The name seemed familiar to Kanda. He took a moment to recall where he had seen the name Allen Walker.

After a few moments, it all clicked. _Oh_, he thought sourly. _It's that brat from science class._

"Is he still here?" Kanda tore his eyes away from the page and looked over at Lavi who had landed near the coffee maker and was pushing some buttons, spilling the liquid on the desk.

As he scrambled to find napkins, Lavi replied offhandedly, "Yeah. I think he's in the front." With that, Kanda made another beeline to the front of the library. It wasn't very hard to spot Allen. Kanda immediately saw the white head of hair.

"Hey, bean sprout," Kanda said, standing on the other side of the small table Allen was sitting at.

Allen rolled his eyes as he seemed to be finishing his sentence. He slowly placed his finger to mark his page in the book. "My name is Allen, BaKanda."

Kanda narrowed his eyes into a fierce glare at the boy. "Che. Are you almost done with that?"

"No. I just started."

Kanda pulled out the chair that was under the table and sat down across from Allen.

Allen had fixed a weary stare at Kanda. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like? I'm sitting." Kanda replied, peering at the back cover of the book.

"By why are you sitting _here_?" Allen asked, pronouncing the last word slowly.

"I'm going to sit here and wait for you to finish."

"Why not go somewhere and then come back later?"

"My assignment is due tomorrow." This brat seriously asks too many questions.

"Luckily for me, mine is due on Tuesday." Allen flashed Kanda a sarcastic smile. Kanda had found it disturbing.

A few minutes of absolute silence had passed and Kanda had the sudden urge to interrupt the bean sprout. Allen had his arm perched on the table, holding his hand and Kanda could still see the red streak going down his face. Too content.

But on the other hand, Kanda wanted Allen to finish the book as quickly as possible so he could finish his assignment as quickly as possible. He decided his amusement wasn't worth it.

To pass some time, Kanda stood up and raked through a shelf. After a while, Kanda gave up on it and returned to his seat.

As soon as Kanda sat down, Allen had started rummaging through a large black bag he had placed on the table. He produced a black book and had held it out towards Kanda.

"Here."

"Why are you giving me _that_?"

"You seem bored. You're welcome."

"I never asked for a book."

"But I'm offering."

"Che."

At that, Allen took aim at Kanda's shoulder and threw the book rather hard. Kanda, who had seen it coming, grabbed the book before it hit and grinned smugly to himself.

Kanda reluctantly opened the book and began to read.

Ten minutes had successfully passed by without any further distractions. Allen realized this and decided to bother BaKanda—and he had the perfect idea how.

"Hey, Kanda," Allen whispered. He saw a twitch beginning to form on his brow. "I know you can hear me. Quit being a jerk."

_Twitch. Twitch._

Allen suddenly had another bright idea. He dug into his bag and pulled out a small notepad, with a very few pages still left in it. On one sheet, Allen wrote down a small word and did the same for the rest of the pages.

Kanda had watched him with a very curious look after a few moments. Allen had obviously run out of pages so he rummaged through his big black bag for something to write on. The part that confused Kanda was that he had pulled out a few papers that had nothing on them, but kept venturing for different papers. Finally, Allen pulled out a small rectangular card and looked at the back side of the paper smugly. He had neatly scrawled the last word on the paper and stuck the other papers into the back of the book.

About a half hour later, Allen had finally finished the book and handed it off to Kanda. He had done nothing to suggest he was still alive besides grin mischievously at Kanda. Kanda had abruptly stopped reading and held the book out to Allen. The bean had done a terrible job at acting as if he hadn't noticed. Apparently, he had noticed to as his pale face got noticeably pink. After that, Allen had stumbled away from Kanda awkwardly and headed towards the door.

_Weirdo._Kanda commented to himself. He slid both books into his bag and headed towards his van.

Once Kanda got home, he plopped on his pristine white living room couch and dug through his bag.

His first mission: Find out what the bean was writing.

After a few moments, Kanda had finally fished the book for Tiedoll's class out of the bag. Let it be known that Kanda Yuu was not one to pack heavily.

Kanda narrowed his eyes at the first paper. It read: "Why" and had a shakily drawn arrow pointing to Kanda's right was drawn in the bottom corner.

_Che._

The next cards read: "Are", "You", "Such", "A" and lastly, "Thief?"

"What?" Kanda Yuu had never stolen in his life!

Well, there was that time when he and Lavi had been fighting in that convenience store. Lavi had, of course, annoyed Kanda and Kanda had begun to throw heavy objects in Lavi's general direction, missing him every time, and slowly but surely demolishing the interior of the store. As a last resort, Kanda had grabbed a stack of magazines and had flung them at Lavi as he fled from the scene

Finally, Kanda pulled out the smallest of the cards. On the front of the card, it had the name "Allen Walker" and a cell phone number and email in a curly font. Kanda turned the card around and saw that in larger letters than the rest, the name "BaKanda" was scrawled.

Without thinking, Kanda flipped the card around and grabbed his cell phone and dialed the number on the back.

But then came another dilemma. Would it be easier to call or send a message to the bean.

After a few moments of arguing intensely with his mind, Kanda had decided it would be much less difficult to send a text message.

_I am not a thief, bean sprout._

Kanda slowly closed his cell phone and placed it next to him on the couch. He then stared at it for a few seconds, waiting for the envelope with "NEW MESSAGE" displayed on top of it, and the _bing_ that came along with it.

Minutes passed one after another and Kanda still didn't see the bean sprout's reply. Kanda grabbed his cell phone and flipped it open and watched as his said black wallpaper flashed a picture of the long-awaited envelope.

The text read:

_Then why do you still have my book?_

Kanda typed a speedy reply, struggling against the cramped keyboard on his cell phone. He seriously needed a new one.

_You didn't ask for it back._

Kanda checked his volume level and made sure the volume was up loud enough.

Once again, Kanda waited _patiently_for the next reply.

Kanda reached out to his coffee table and grabbed his television remote. Kanda leisurely flipped through the channels, glancing at his cell phone once every few seconds. Gradually, Kanda settled on a gaming channel. He scrolled through the list looking for a game he would enjoy, and wouldn't provoke too many thoughts. He needed a game that would put him in an absent-minded state.

Bejeweled.

As Kanda was waiting for the screen to load, he heard a loud banging on his front door. Kanda instinctively ignored the knocks and started an 'Action' game of Bejeweled.

"Yuu!" A muffled voice called through his door, as soon as he made his first match. The voice from outside somehow rivaled the deep voice of the speaker on the game booming, "Great!"

As Kanda had immediately recognized the voice, eyed his sword across the room wearily. Really, Lavi never learned.

"I can see you, you know." Kanda honestly didn't care, so he calmly continued his game.

After a few minutes of an unnatural silence, Kanda got an overwhelming feeling of danger. Always being one to trust his instinct, Kanda quickly and quietly stepped across the room and grabbed his now unsheathed sword. He held it in his hand and continued to play his game, lowering the volume to listen for any unwelcomed sounds.

Then a sudden thought slammed into his brain—the bean might have replied.

Kanda slid off of the couch and snatched his cell phone off of the coffee table. Kanda flipped open his cell phone and clicked on his 'new message' envelope too eagerly than he would have liked.

_So u steal it? Watevv, ik you're w/o morals ;D_

_Wen r u gonna give it back?*_

Kanda had to stare blankly at the message for a few seconds. However, Kanda's confusion wasn't enough too distract him from the not-so-quiet footsteps radiating from his kitchen.

_Knew it._ Kanda thought bitterly, finally quitting out of the game. Bejeweled could wait.

Kanda stood up with a look of complete evil and grabbed his sword. Kanda stepped loudly towards the kitchen, giving the bum that had broke into his house a subtle notification that he had heard them—and then a less subtle notification that he would be promptly burying them in his back yard.

Once he got to the doorway of the kitchen, he gripped his lethal weapon and lunged forward at the figure standing at his refrigerator. Mud-lunge, Kanda realized the patch of red and the shiny leather jacket and narrowed his eyes, aiming Mugen at the middle of the red hair.

Before Kanda could comprehend what was happening, he felt a surge run through his hands.

"Ow." He muttered, rubbing them together.

"Now, Yuu-chan," he heard the all too familiar voice basically sing. "if that had anyone but me, you would have been in prison for 16 years with a cell mate named Sally."

Kanda snorted. "Like I'd get caught." Lavi slid by him and continued to raid his refrigerator.

A faint 'bing' sounded and Kanda immediately headed towards his living room.

Flipping open his cell phone, he saw he had another reply from the bean sprout. He hadn't replied back thought, had he?

_Too advanced for you, BaKanda? I should have known you were a complete social hermit, and cant understand text talk._

Kanda glared at the cell phone and began to type his reply. Much to his annoyance, he felt the couch shift slightly and hi felt an eye staring at him.

"Who're you texting, Yuu?" Came the question Kanda had been dreading.

"Nosy."

Lavi had developed a wicked smirk and directed his glance to the screen of Kanda's cell phone. So Kanda hid the only thing he deemed sensible at the moment. He turned the phone away from Lavi and resumed his typing.

In a matter of seconds, the cell phone was in Lavi's hand as he ran for his life through the household. Once he was on the second floor, Lavi quickly ran into the first lockable door he saw. The door to the bath room.

Meanwhile, Kanda had been looking around on the second floor for the stupid rabbit. Every few seconds, he paused to listen to the sounds of his keyboard and quickly found his destination.

Lavi had long finished sending a few messages to Allen, but was just hiding to mess with Yuu. Lavi went through the rest of the conversation with an amused smirk.

_Yuu so doesn't know how to flirt._Lavi thought. He then decided to take his leave in his safe spot and enter the war zone.

_Perfect timing._ Lavi thought as Kanda came storming down the hall. Lavi stood his ground and stretched his arm towards the raging bull. Kanda snatched his cell phone and immediately went to his sent messages only to find the ones he sent before.

"…What did you do?" Kanda hissed, checking his inbox. Laavi had too deleted the bean's messages. How clever of him.

"I helped you, Yuu." Lavi let his voice trail off mysteriously. At the look on Kanda's face, Lavi did a quick math equation.

Yuu-chan + Confusion + Easy escape for Lavi

Lavi snickered at his solution and quickly jagged down the stairs and exited the house.

_Che._

So Kanda took the only logical step he could think of. He flipped open his cell phone and quickly sent a text to the bean sprout.

_What was the last thing I sent you?_

But wait—Kanda had an even _brighter_ idea.

_Actually, fwd the last msgs._ He smirked down at the cell phone.

_Heh. Too advanced?_Kanda thought.

Kanda trailed down the stairs and went back to his bag on the couch.

After all that Kanda still hadn't started his reading. _Shame._

So after all that time whilst Kanda was reading, Allen had never replied back. Kanda. Not being one to be patient, had went to his contacts and selected "CALL" next to Allen's name.

After the first few rings, a squeaky voice spoke up.

"Hello?"

"Bean sprout," Kanda was pretty sure he heard the bean sprout gasp. "You didn't forward the messages."

"Yes," Allen replied back, more loudly than he had spoken before. "I know."

…

"Why not?"

Kanda could _hear_ the fluster in the Allen's voice. "Y-you deranged, sadistic, sicko!" Kanda merely waited for the bean sprout to calm down. "I'd feel so dirty that I's need to shower for the next three days if I had sent that! So vile."

"Calm down, bean. Your British is showing." Kanda heard Allen start to protest yet again and waited for him to stop talking.

"This is starting to get old, bean. Tell me what the messages said."

"Have you developed a sudden case of amnesia, BaKanda?"

"Quit being annoying, bean."

"I refuse."

With that, Kanda hung up the phone. As he had told the bean, this was dragging on for way too long. He decided to wait until tomorrow. Then, he could wait until science and …borrow the bean's cell phone. Brilliance.

**I sense a conclusion coming on... I actually have an epilogue planned for this. I was going to add it to the end of this chapter but...**

**I decided not to.**

**So coming up next will be Assistant. Kanda's a lazy author so he hires a live in assistant (Allen.)**

**Hehe.**


	2. Assistant

Hey guys. Okay, this here is Assistant.

When one is as broke as a glass vase that has fallen from the 49th floor of a building onto the pavement below of a busy street and onto the foot of an unsuspecting passerby, one would normally take any and as many jobs as one possibly could. No matter how low one would have to stoop and how beneath another one would have to be. But being honest, our main character did not care about that at the moment. He was, in fact, more broke than that most unfortunate vase. He was more broke than that poor passerby's foot actually. And our main character's dire situation was all brought upon him by the reincarnation of the devil himself, Cross Marian.

_Cross Marian was a man that had seen the most beautiful of places, wore the finest of clothes, met the most memorable of people, but had unfortunately stacked up millions of dollars in debt. Like any other person in his situation, he got a few jobs to work off his debts, but who was he kidding? That would take too long. He needed help, and he was not getting involved with companies who ask too many questions. That was when he decided to get a flunky- erm, an apprentice._

_Said poor apprentice was an already unfortunate boy before Cross came around. That poor boy went by the name of Allen Walker and just so happened to live next door to Cross in a small town house. Allen Walker's guardian, Mana Walker, had passed away about a month before Cross had his sudden epiphany._

_So early one fateful morning, Cross to a short stroll to the house next door and knocked obnoxiously loudly. After a few seconds, he pressed his ear to the door and heard quiet shuffles somewhere in the silent house._

_Instead of waiting patiently like a normal human being, Cross reached into his shoe and pulled out a small gun._

_"Oi! Brat, open this door before I shoot!" Cross roared, kicking on the door. He heard a faint scoff._

_"Like you'll actually shoot me." That brat actually had the nerve to lean out of the second floor window and stare back with distaste at Cross. Without any hesitation, Cross fired three bullets at the window, aiming for Allen. Luckily for the boy, he got away fast enough to miss a shot to the head. He scrambled down the stairs and opened the front door reluctantly._

_"What do you want?" he asked, resisting an eye roll._

_"You don't have any other relatives, do you?" Allen shook his head. "Alright, pack your crap and meet me at my car. Any sass and," Cross tapped the end of his gun pointing out threateningly. "See you in twenty." With that, Cross turned on his heel and headed back to his house to pack his things, leaving Allen flabbergasted._

As you know, Allen did not have a very pleasant experience with "apprenticeship." Now we shall fast forward through the next five or so years of hopping across the globe, changing identities, and stacking debts upon debts, to Allen's current dilemma. As of right now, Allen was tucked away in a very small apartment with a newspaper sprawled on his mattress. Allen was looking through the job listings section. One that caught his eye said:

**WRITER, YUU KANDA LOOKING FOR ASSISTANT**

**If you know how to operate a fax machine, envelopes, a telephone, and English, call (***-***-****)**

**Living quarters and expenses provided, pay will be discussed upon hiring**

Immediately, Allen scurried out of his bed and darted to his cell phone, dialing the numbers in quickly.

After the first few rings, a low and tired and most definitely male voice picked up.

"Che."

Allen took that as a greeting. "Hello. I saw your advertisement in the newspaper and I would like to apply."

"Age."

"Nineteen."

"Name."

"Allen Walker."

"You're a dude? Beansprout."

"I don't think that it's appropriate-"

Allen heard a snort on the other end. "Doesn't matter. Why do you want this job?"

Allen had to remain silent for a second and think about how to explain his entire life in a nutshell.

"Oi. Bean. Did you die?" But by that point Allen had already paraphrased his time with Mana and was moving on to how he became affiliated with Cross, and has subconsciously tuned Kanda out. "What happened to working English?" he snorted.

It took Allen a few seconds to comprehend. "No, ru..." Allen trailed off as he remembered this was his future employer. He couldn't _say _what he wanted, but surely could think.

And _oh_ did he think.

"To put it simple, I was orphaned at a young age and then kidnapped by my next door neighbor a few months later. Since then I have been hunted by debt collectors and strange women from basically everywhere in the world. And on top of that, I am completely broke, living in a ratty apartment complex filled to the brim with people who want my and my uncles blood."

After Allen had curtly explained, the man on the other end went into an awkward silence.

"Damn, kid."

"Heh, yeah."

"Well you sound like a hermit, so I'm assuming you have nothing to tomorrow. You start tomorrow afternoon." Kanda quickly gave Allen the address and promptly hung up the phone.

So when Allen showed up in front of the residence, he was surprisingly not as surprised as he'd thought he would be. Although the mansion towered over him by a dozen feet, as normal homes of that sixe do, and was a rather unintimidating shade of tan, Allen found the estate itself suitable to the man he had briefly spoken to on the phone, not that he knew why immediately.

Allen approached the door and pressed the small button next to the door, listening to the _buzz_ sound inside the house. A few moments later, the door was pulled open to reveal a man who was at the least a foot taller than Allen, towering over him at around 6'4". Just by looking at the features in his face, Allen could tell the man was of Asian descent. And swishing behind him was long and extremely black hair that had a very evident bluish tint. Overall, Allen concluded that this was a very pretty man, but the one thing that seemed out of place was the constant scowl glazed on his face.

"Allen Walker, isn't it?" Allen felt uncomfortable with the heavy gaze on him.

"Yes." The man opened the door a fraction more than he had it before, stepping aside so that Allen could just barely slide through.

The interior was just as Allen had expected: clean and expensively expansive. As soon as Allen slid through the door, he was met face to face with an excruciatingly large winding staircase that cascaded into the second floor of the house (which had two doors on opposing ends of the corridor.) Beneath the structure was a gothic-styled door frame which led into the kitchen that Allen could not see very clearly from where he was standing. The entire room, form what he could see, was all a part of a gray and light blue family.

"Stare in awe, bean." Kanda's voice broke into Allen's intense study of the first room. Allen looked around and found that the older man was leaning over the railing of the second floor, glowering down at him. Without saying anything, Allen scurried up the staircase and began to follow Kanda to the end of the hallway, which actually wasn't the end of the hallway.

Through the next corridor, Allen saw the second door on the right thrown open. Kanda was standing in the far corner of the room, next to the window, concealing another door. He began in a monotone, "This is where the artistic magic happens. My office." Despite the sarcasm oozing out of every word, Kanda still managed to look like a corpse. "And this," he stepped to the side. "is your room. There's another exit in there, in case you were wondering." Kanda pointed lazily to some corner of the room that Allen couldn't see, though he nodded anyway. With that, Kanda stepped away from the doorway and seated himself at his computer, evidently dismissing Allen. Reluctantly, Allen took the hint and began settling his belongings in his new room.

_This is quite nice... _Allen thought absently, setting down the last of his clothes in a drawer. There was an obscenely huge desk right in front of the window graciously outfitted with a fax machine, an address book, printer, telephone, laptop, and a large stack of envelopes, all semi-neatly placed.

Suddenly, Allen remembered why he was there in the first place and jogged over to the door separating his and Kanda's rooms. He turned the door knob and lo and behold-it didn't open. Allen tried the door knob again and realized that it was locked. From the other side.

From instinct, Allen began to panic. "Kanda! Open the door!"

He heard a snort. "Are you claustrophobic, bean?"

"Why would you lock me in?" Allen then began muttering to himself. "I knew I should have never applied, shady writer man! I should have _known_, he must be a Poe fanatic, it'll be like the Silence of the Lambs 2!"

"Seriously? There's a door right behind you. Look to your left, stupid." When Allen spun around on his heel, he saw yet another door.

"Oh." Allen was thankful that the door in front of him remained closed, for his skin tone had suddenly heated up of embarrassment. He reached for the doorknob and fumbled with it until it opened. Allen then took the short journey next door and stared distastefully at the older man before him, lounging in the same spot he had been in before.

"Ahem." Kanda glanced over wearily at Allen. "So...what can I do?"

"Call my editor."

"Who is your editor?"

"Froi Tiedoll."

"And what should I tell him?" Allen had a feeling that Kanda wanted him to talk about the deadline on whatever he was writing, but decided it would be better to ask Kanda first.

"Extend my deadline." Allen smirked triumphantly to himself.

"For how long?"

"Three days." At this point, Allen has seated himself on a small swiveling chair, much like Kanda's.

"So," Allen started. "What are you writing?"

"A novel."

"And what is that novel about?" _Does his vocabulary seriously only have six syllable phrases? _

This time, Kanda's reply was a shrug. "That's why I need the extension time. I have to figure that out.

_Hm. _Allen thought dryly._ At least that's more than before._

"What do you normally write about?" Allen had expertly scooted that chair closer to the desk without Kanda noticing. Although, it was more due to the carpet than the Allen's ninja skills.

"Rainbows, unicorns, flowers, world peace, etcetera." Noticing how Allen looked like a fish flopping on his carpet, he added, "No really, it's the name of one of my novels." Kanda turned back to the computer and began looking through his documents and Allen stood out of his seat to see better.

Surely enough, at the top of the page it read, "Rainbows, unicorns, flowers, world peace, etc," But as Allen read on, his amused expression shriveled into one of disgust and horror.

"My word! What is wrong with you?" Allen sputtered. "Seek help, please, you sick man!" Allen scanned the page again. "And what in this bloody twisted country is a 'Lavi Bookman?'"

"It's a name, bean. And I'm not American, if you couldn't tell."

"So it's one of your targets, huh? Oh how _twisted_ are you? I'll bet my life savings that you have more stories like _that_ hidden somewhere!" Allen shook his head in disgust.

"No. It's the name of an author. I didn't write this, calm down. It was a joke."

Allen's face turned impossibly redder under Kanda's gaze, which seemed to slowly soften. The edges of his mouth quirked up in what Allen thought was a smirk but honestly wasn't-it was a genuine smile.

After Allen has calmed down, he realized that in his paranoia-fueled rant, he had stood up and pushed his chair back with all the force.

"Kanda," Allen noticed that the older man had immediately tensed up and shifted around uncomfortably hearing his name in Allen's high pitched, accented voice. "...is it okay if I call you Kanda? Or would it be better if I called you Mr. Yuu? Or maybe even sir-"

"Kanda is fine."

"Oh, okay. So Kanda, are you sure those three days will be enough time to figure out you novel and write a draft?" Allen asked, peering over at the blank document Kanda was staring at.

"Trust me, bean, I'll be done. Just call Tiedoll."

Allen nodded and went off next door, not bothering to close the door since he's be right back anyway. He took his seat on the swivel chair at his desk and paged through Kanda's little contact book until he found Kanda's editor.

After the first few rings, Froi Tiedoll picked up the phone.

"Yuu-dear? Is that you?" The obviously elder man asked.

"No, sir. This is Allen Walker, his assistant. Kanda asked me to call to let you know he'll need three days after his deadline to finish his draft."

"Oh, ho ho ho, sonny, I think we both know he'll need a little more than that. Let Yuu know I said that's fine."

"Alright, sir. Goodbye." Out of courtesy, Allen waited for the small 'bye' that followed before he headed back to Kanda's room.

"He said it's fine." Allen said shortly, looking around for his chair. Lo and behold, Kanda had slid it far enough away to rest his lower legs on it, not even bothering to glance at Allen.

Had this been anyone but Allen's employer, Allen would have plopped on his feet, but since he was, Allen stood behind him peering over the top of his head.

Not that Allen knew, but he was definitely not at a polite distance away from Kanda. Kanda was reading some of his older stories and appreciated the silence. But then Allen waltzes over, draping his cold little hands centimeters away from Kanda's head. He could basically feel the chill radiating off, even though he wasn't touching him. And on top of that—literally—Allen's head was now resting against the top of the chair. He was seriously breathing down Kanda's neck, making him shiver and instinctively lean away.

"Would you like for me to move, Kanda?"

"Che." Kanda took the hint and slid his feet off the chair, letting Allen take his seat back.

"Alright boss, what else can I do?" Kanda stopped reading for a second and looked above the computer at the clock.

"Go downstairs. I'm expecting a guest who'd _love_ to meet you." Kanda said with a smirk.

Allen however didn't notice and stood off his chair and started down the long winding staircase. Rather conveniently for Allen, who would have been standing around for God knows how long, the doorbell rang as soon as he reached the bottom of the stairs.

Allen ran his hand through his hair and pulled the door open.

Allen had already decided he didn't like the man in front of him. He was at the least eight inches taller than Allen and made it completely obvious by leaning his elbow against the doorframe and leaning down at the younger boy with his one good eye.

"Hey there, kiddo. Where's Kanda?" the velvety voice matched perfectly with what Allen thought it would be. "I'm Lavi by the way, Yuu's best friend."

At that, Allen let his shoulders droop and rolled his eyes up at the taller man. "I'm not a kid, Lavi. And my name is Allen Walker." Having Lavi's name rolling off his tongue, Allen felt the familiarity. "Would your last name happen to be Bookman?

"Sure thing, little buddy." Allen moved out of the doorway and followed behind Lavi glaring at his back.

"I'm nineteen." That was probably the cutest thing Lavi heard all month. With his high pitched, frustrated, English accented voice and his red face, Lavi could hardly believe that a cutie pie like Allen could be nineteen. But how could a face like that lie?

"I'm twenty-one, but it's okay, babe. You're still short enough to be ten." Lavi turned to ruffle his hair and couldn't help but laugh when he saw the boy storming off into the room next to Kanda's office.

"Yuu-chan, who's the bean?" Lavi asked, perching on the chair rather close to Kanda.

"My assistant."

"Pfft. The hell do you need an assistant for when you've got me?"

"You are the reason I need an assistant. The only thing you help me with is distractions with all the noise you make."

"I feel betrayed, Yuu. But he's a cutie, so it's fine. Is he living here?"

"Che."

"Yuu, we should totally have a new roomie party! But like only us three since nobody else would show up. We could, like, run around in our pajamas and watch The Notebook and do girly shit like that all night—"

"No. And I don't use pajamas anyway."

"How risqué. Keep it PG."

"He's legal."

The room got oddly silent and Kanda stopped typing when he realized what he had said. Kanda prayed to whatever god was laughing at him to push the bean on the furthest corner of his room, making sure that he heard absolutely nothing of the past thirty seconds.

A short cough came from behind the door and Kanda growled as his face went painfully hot as he ungracefully face-planted on his desk.

"Get out, Lavi."

"But, Yuu—"

"_Get out._"

Lavi got up and slithered behind Kanda to slip through to Allen's room.

Sure enough, the white haired boy was fiddling around with the envelopes on his desk, red from his neck to his hairline.

"It's okay, buddy." Lavi said, running his fingers through Allen's hair, scratching his scalp until his fingers were slapped away.

Lavi poked his head back in to Kanda's room and saw that the tips of his ears were still engulfed in flames. _Rather interesting._


End file.
